Sunday, April 29, 2007

I am Not Happy!

For the last few days I've been putting on a big act. I've been going to the doors and windows and crying my most pitiful cry. I've been trying to tell Mom and Dad that I want to go outside. When the crocodile tears didn't work, I tried scratching at the door (that usually works for Katie's room). Still, they didn't let me out. They kept giving me some lame excuse about the last time I got lost for four days. That wasn't my fault, somehow Stinky is to blame for that, and as soon as I figure out how, I'm gonna smack him for it.
I kept up my routine anyway. Usually after a few days of me asking for something continually day and night, they give in. I get lots of bakery goods that way.
Instead, this time Dad came home with a monstronsity. He calls it a harness. I call it a device of torture. He strapped it on me, hooked it to a dog leash, and carried me outside.
Then, he stood there with me! How am I supposed to do adventurous things with a 6' cord that leads straight to Dad.
Trapped like a Dog! How revolting.
I might as well go back inside.
I decided to use his jacket as a scratching post as a proper thank you.

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Sunday, April 08, 2007

Major Product Endorsement

Dad has finally found the cord for the Camera so that I can update my blog. I've had to wait for months for him to do this. He keeps giving me some lame excuse about being at work for 14 hours a day. That still leaves 10 hours to do my bidding. Plenty of time.

After my failed attempt at political endorsement, I have decided that product endorsement is the way to go. I will be sending a bill to Krispy Kreme Donuts for my obvious endorsement earlier in this blog. Payment will be expected in donuts... the ones with the creme in them... maybe a whole dozen.

My next endorsement will be for Lloyds Barbeque Chicken. It comes in a big tub and it's all shredded up. I just have to wait for Mom to turn her back for a minute, and it's all mine. This is the spot where I'll say how wonderful it is, and earn that great big endorsement fee.

"It Tastes Like Chicken!" - Nagi

Now if that isn't a glowing endorsement, I'm not sure what is. I'll expect my own personalized tub to be delivered immediately. If you deliver 2 tubs, then I'll allow you to print my endorsement on the package.

Once you deliver the tubs, I want to talk to you about this idea I have for Barbeque Shredded Mouse. I think it would really take off.
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